Amusing Money Quotes and Jokes for this Weekend

funnymoney2.jpgBuy land. They’ve stopped making it.” – Mark Twain

Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem.” – Bill Vaughn

I made my money the old fashioned way. I was very nice to a wealthy relative right before he died.” – Malcolm Forbes

If all the rich people in the world divided up their money among themselves, there wouldn’t be enough to go around.” – Christina Stead

I finally know what distinguishes man from other beasts: financial worries.” – Jules Renard

A letter from a college student

The parents of a Northwestern student who just headed back from holiday received this letter: Dear Mom and Dad: Univer$ity life i$ $o wonderful! Cla$$e$ and $e$$ion are intere$ting, my cla$$mate$ are the be$t! But after $pending all my ca$h on Chri$tma$ pre$ent$, I am in a little need for $ome $pending money for book$ and $uch. But I don’t want to $end the wrong $ignal$ home.

Insufficient Funds

A
young college co-ed came running in tears to her father. “Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!” “I did? What did I tell you?” said the dad. “You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that big bank is in trouble.” “What are you talking about? That’s one of the largest banks in the state,” he said. “There must be some mistake.” “I don’t think so,” she sniffed. “They just returned one of my checks with a note saying, ‘Insufficient Funds’.”

Saving money
Mother had decided to trim her household budget wherever possible, so instead of having a dress dry-cleaned she washed it by hand. Proud of her savings, she boasted to my father, just think, Fred, we are five dollars richer because I washed this dress by hand. Good, my dad quickly replied. Wash it again!

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6 Responses

  1. zakman says:

    A letter from a college student
    The parents of a Northwestern student who just headed back from holiday received this letter: Dear Mom and Dad: Univer$ity life i$ $o wonderful! Cla$$e$ and $e$$ion are intere$ting, my cla$$mate$ are the be$t! But after $pending all my ca$h on Chri$tma$ pre$ent$, I am in a little need for $ome $pending money for book$ and $uch. But I don’t want to $end the wrong $ignal$ home.

    Reply from Dad: Dear Son: It appears like the ‘s’ key on your keyboard is faulty – it’s printing ‘$’ instead of ‘s’. I’ll be happy to buy you a new keyboard.

  2. Robin Bal says:

    Hi Zakman,

    Now thats what I call a smart smart dad.. 😆 I might have told him to sell the friggin computer and buy the books.. 😉

    Take care and cheers.

  3. Daniel says:

    Great post. They did make me smile this morning. good job!

  4. Shane says:

    “Buy land. They’ve stopped making it.”

    I always liked this quote. The funny thing is, Mark Twain never imagined this:

    http://www.gregghawkins.com/articles-follow-up-on-the-world/

  5. Robin Bal says:

    Hi Daniel,

    Glad you liked the post mate. Thanks for your visit and comment.

    Take care and cheers.

  6. Robin Bal says:

    Hi Shane,

    I checked that link and I guess Mark Twain didn’t imagine that.

    Take care and Cheers

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